2013 Who's who at the Lunatic Soup Lounge - you might get mentioned...

Another big turn out for the Sunday bash at the Lunatic Soup Lounge. It is truly a revolving door of talent, and I sometimes wonder, as do many of us, where all these people come from -a brief  rundown could be helpful.. . Due to a lack of investigative reporting skills, however,  the following facts were gleaned exclusively from the mobile phone records of a hairdresser in Refinery Waters, Altona West, and neither I nor Madge are responsible for them, never knew about them, didn’t read the e-mails, and this is the humblest day of my life, etc. etc.

 Sunday Arvo’s Jammers:  a potted Who’s Who.

Frank is the bass player. Has a habit of chopping off his own fingers, and has been known to play in the key of H.. Strangely, neither trait affects his playing much….

Captain Chaos (saxophone): proudly boasts a rat cunning index of about 11, due to his habit of always finding a tune he knows, and occasionally handing out charts in the wrong key. Has never dropped a bar or missed a beat in his life, and we’ve got Col’s word for that.

Danielo the drummer: works for Fiat, so we know he is not an auto-electrican.

Tom the drummer, Not to be confused with the other Tom the drummer, as he is confused enough already.

Keef: (Saxophone) Recently shaved off the facial fungus, and is now unrecognisable.Not that he was ever that recognisable anyway. To be known as Kojak in future…

Rob “Inky fingers” McCue, esteemed editor and occasional pianist of the scottish persuasion. Got roaring drunk on Hogmanay and has never been the same  since. And we’re talking about 1973…

Don: (guitar) moonlights as lead guitarist in a hip hop calypso outfit. Never hangs out with less than three band groupies. Or not, who knows. He has never denied it, mainly because I have never asked him. So it could be true. Might own a salami factory.

Kay: Singer. Spent years in the Northern Territory trying to turn handbags into crocodiles, then saw the light and has been warbling by numbers ever since.

Trevor: blues harp, hat and a wide, wide  grin.. They say you can’t really dig the blues until you have experienced real hardship in your life. After listening to Trevor, we can all dig it that little bit more.. just kiddin’ Trev…

Julie Stewart; singer. ripped through Route 66, and a couple of  dubious ripostes. And I will stop right there… 

Noriyo: piano player.  Turns out arrigato is not a pasta salad after all. My mistake.

Bob Vinard : another bluddy piano player. Has never been featured on A Current Affair.  Yet.

Fred: bongoes. Fred is 22, but has done a  helluva lot of naughty things with his bongos. Or he is not 22 and the bongoes are blameless. You decide.

Ali (saxophone) Came from Indonesia, or the Phillippines or somewhere else. No boats were involved.

James Osborne: the Canadian drummer: Like many drummers, James is an intellectual, with a serious approach to his craft, and a real dedication to technical excellence. Then he starts hitting things. .

Last but not leased: Louis the Fly: Mellodica. Which he sucks and blows in about equal proportions. Very popular with the ladies.

A stellar lineup, which made for a fine afternoon’s entertainment.

See yez at the next jam…TW